Chapter 1 of the COVID-19 Coffee Survival Guide
If you're looking to take advantage of your time during self-isolation, why not learn a new skill that will have you feeling like you are back in the coffee shop. Read along as we take you through a simple guide on how to make great artisanal coffee while in the comfort of your own home. With these tips, you'll achieve that fresh tasting cafe coffee and all you'll need is a virtual date over FaceTime to enjoy it with! Once you fulfill your at-home coffee needs, check out our article What you Can Do To Save Small Local Businesses to learn more about supporting others in this difficult time.
Chapter 1 Unplugging From Coffee Advertising
First thing we need to get are coffee beans. But wait you say.. “I already have coffee beans, in my freezer, they are right here frozen, I have some.”
STOP... STOP...
My friend, unfortunately this mindset is a product of brainwashing by multinational corporations that control the coffee economy. The truth is, this information is a sham meaning, you likely have been living in the coffee matrix and what you think is reality is in fact, you and Keanu Reeves plugged into a giant virtual reality machine of coffee oooz.
It’s time to unplug from the matrix and wake up to...
FRESHNESS!
If you have been drinking coffee from multinational corporations, then all the coffee you have been drinking is DEAD STALE. While you may have been getting by and thinking to yourself “I have been drinking this coffee for decades and I have not dropped dead yet.” The fact of the matter is you are consuming coffee that is not fresh. And thanks to the multinational corporations, you are likely paying a premium price for next to no quality.
In fact, most store bought packaged processed foods, the cookies, twinkies and chips are stale and haven’t killed us. At the same time, we don't pay a premium for things we know ARE NOT fresh. Unfortunately, the coffee consumer will pay more and does so without any thought to quality.
Interesting fact: Did you know those Nespresso pods that your dinner host believes to be a rare delicacy are actually dead stale coffee? And can cost over 40 dollars a pound!?!?!
The coffee I drink, and those coffee drinkers who are unplugged from the matrix, is typically 3-14 days old from the roasting machine.
That's it!
In other words, we buy fresh coffee almost every week, similar to buying bread, milk or eggs. You don't see people hoarding milk during this COVID-19 crisis, do you? Why? Because it would all spoil. This is how coffee should be treated. Instead, the average consumer has no idea that coffee goes stale, so everyone in Costco who are LOADING up on everything under the sun, including coffee, are actually loading up on stale coffee.
How to Make Coffee At Home
If you’re ready to make a change and freshen up your coffee game, consider making your coffee at home. To produce quality coffee at home, like the ones you normally find in the coffee shops, follow these 3 simple rules:
- Buy FRESH... 3 to 14 days from roast date.
- Only buy from sources that print the BIRTH DATE of the coffee on the bag.
- DON'T buy anything that has a best before date, because that is actually a DEATH DATE.
And no, you don't have to pay an arm and a leg for quality fresh coffee. For many of you, buying from a high quality artisan coffee roaster will probably be the same cost as the stale coffee you are currently buying. For some of you, it will actually save you money, especially, if you have been unknowingly paying for stale ‘premium’ coffee from overseas; or even worse, coffee in capsule or pod form. (which is terribly bad for the environment to boot!)
So there is your homework- get some fresh beans and discover the true meaning of freshly brewed coffee.
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MORE ON THE COVID SURVIVAL COFFEE GUIDE
CHAPTERS:
Chapter 1: If you’re ready to make a change and freshen up your coffee game, consider making your coffee at home. To produce quality coffee at home, like the ones you normally find in the coffee shops, follow these 3 simple rules... Read More >
Chapter 2: Now that you understand freshness as it pertains to coffee beans (3-14 days from its BIRTH DATE or Roast date, and only buy enough to last a week) . This will give us a good starting point because we finally have some quality ingredients...Learn More >
Chapter 3: Ok.. you managed to escape the matrix and now that you have acquired the supplies needed to take on the coffee universe on your own, we are here to offer you some help!
4 Tools Needed to Brew Coffee At Home... Read More >
Chapter 4: If you have Italian friends, and they offer you a "caffe" , chances are they pull out a stove top device that unscrews in four parts, (base, top pouring chamber or pitcher, basket and basket cover) called a Moka Pot...Learn More >
Chapter 5: I have a personal problem with pour over people because they tend to hold the opinion that pour overs like Hario v60, Chemex, Kalita, are great, but that batch brew Drip Coffee Makers suck. The reality is...Read More >
Chapter 6: Let's explore further why the proponents of Cold Brew coffee are so maniacal in their support of this process. 4 reasons: ... Learn More >
Chapter 7: Frankly this viral hype surprises most of us in the industry but, in my opinion, it is a good thing that people are seeking innovation when it comes to coffee beverages. I just wish it didn’t involve instant coffee! ... Learn More >
Chapter 8: Prior to the cold brew fad, the go-to method of making a cold coffee was to utilize the alien👽 technology known as ice.
Apparently, when you add ice to things, they get colder...Learn More >
Chapter 9: If you survive this chapter, you will have my respect, and moreover, you will have learned about the basic principles of extraction...Learn More >
Chapter 10:We are revisiting a brewing device that was long ago dismissed as an alternative for espresso. Of course I'm talking about the Aeropress. Full admission. I was an anti Aeropress-er (not anymore). For those of you not familiar with the Aeropress way of making coffee it's a strange looking plastic device that looks like a giant syringe...Learn More >
Chapter 11: I'm going to tread into dangerous waters here and talk about one of the most controversial taboo subjects in the realm of 3rd and 4th wave coffee (aka pretentious coffee). What am I talking about? Blended drinks.. , AKA frappuccinos...Learn More >
Chapter 12:There is a false belief marketed that you need to spend a lot of money on specialized equipment in order to make good coffee and latte art. This insidious belief implies you need to...Learn More >
Chapter 13:The easiest way to avoid cream and sugar in your coffee is to buy higher quality coffee, you will taste that it is naturally sweet as opposed to the dark burnt, bitter stuff from chain stores, so try out a local independent coffee shop...Learn More >
Post Pandemic:Luckily, in the past the coffee industry has proven itself relatively recession-proof. Big question is, if it is pandemic proof ?...Learn More >